WHY DISCIPLINE MATTERS IN AREAS YOU DIDN’T THINK IT DID

Self-discipline simply means the ability to impose your desired will onto yourself.

It’s the ability to persevere, think ahead, finish what you start, and exercise self-restraint when you’re faced with something that might not be in your best interest. The ability to control one’s own behavior and delay gratification are the two hallmarks of self-discipline.

Self-discipline means being two things for yourself: butler and disciplinarian.

The power of being your own butler cannot be understated. When your current self is always thanking your past-tense self, things are going well. When your current self is concerned mostly with taking care of your future self, things will continue to go well.

Staying focused on taking care of your future self will create so much room in your life for more of the other authority traits, mainly enjoyment. From making your bed, to laying out the clothing that the future you will need in the morning, there’s power in being your own butler. Imagine how easy it will be to have gratitude when the one of the major sources of your gratitude is your past self. Imagine how cool it would be to care so much about your future self, that you’re willing to slightly deprive your present-tense self to get things set up for him or her.

The butler concept may only be a few paragraphs, but it’s so powerful that it’s worth keeping on the fridge, mirror, dashboard, or desk. Are you taking care of future (insert your name here)?

• Did your past-tense self leave you a sink full of dishes?
• Did your past-tense self go to bed late and not give a shit what time you had to wake up?
• Did your past-tense self make you get into an unmade bed?
• Did your past-tense self create a financial situation for you?

It’s time to move your focus into being the butler of your future self.

Being the disciplinarian may be equally as challenging. The disciplinarian acts as a decision-vetoing machine, forcing you to take the right action when it needs to be done.

The disciplinarian will step in immediately when you feel tired and want to throw your clothes on the floor, or when you feel like staying up a little late to finish binge-watching that show. The disciplinarian takes over when you feel like not going to the gym, eating crappy food, or when your hand is poised to hit the snooze button for the eleventh time.

Taking the right action is difficult without having the habits in place. Take one or two small behaviors to fix at a time until they become easy to manage, and easy for you to veto the bad behaviors. Keep moving forward for just a few months and you’ll have a lifestyle people dream of.

So many people assume that they need more discipline to do things throughout their lives; to get things done. In reality, you only need the discipline required to form a habit. Once the habit is formed, you don’t need discipline for that task any more.

When you see people going to the gym on a regular basis, it’s not because of discipline for most of them. They are just in the habit of going. They used discipline for a few weeks to get into the habit of going; convincing themselves they had time, forcing themselves to schedule the gym, and keeping themselves accountable for going every day. After a little while, the disciplinarian no longer needs to tend to that task, and can focus on developing the next habit.

Develop habits with discipline, then do it again. After 20 years in the military, I know that it’s habit that separate the successful from the losers. They all have habits, and it only took a few tablespoons of discipline to create them. You actually CAN do this…for real.

HOW IT TRIGGERS AUTHORITY TRIPWIRES

Discipline shows itself in strange ways in conversation and social settings. When someone has self-discipline, it doesn’t exactly show up in their behavior.

Appearance
Discipline shows itself in personal appearance. Personal hygiene, haircut, clothing and even skin condition can reflect the amount of self-discipline someone has.

Confidence
Self-discipline feeds confidence. In many situations, just knowing you have more discipline than most of the people around you is enough to change your behavior to a more confident state. Knowing you woke up two hours earlier than anyone else in the room, or that you eat better than anyone in the room shows up in your behavior. Someone with self-discipline shows their behavior in ways that aren’t always obvious.

Connection
Having self-discipline enables you to be more outgoing, and less concerned with what you left undone back at home. It prevents the ‘I’m irresponsible’ reminder system that lets us know we left things undone, and that we are ‘faking it’.

​Internalized Feeling
You’ve met someone with incredible self-discipline before. It shows somehow. You CAN develop that kind of discipline that people can ‘feel’ in a conversation. When we know someone has an admirable level of self-discipline, we know they stick to their own timelines, and we also tend to see them as more trustworthy.

7 WAYS TO HACK SELF DISCIPLINE

Schedule everything

• we wonder why there’s not enough time in the day to get our tasks done, and to make new habits, but when we schedule and block off time, it not only makes us more willing to say ‘NO’ to people, it shows you where your time is going every day.
• Use a calendar for planning, at the end of the day, make it into a little diary to show where your time went if you deviated from your planned events that day.

Track your habits obsessively

• However possible, keep a visual log of how you’re doing. Make measurements of your progress on a daily basis, and track your progress. This shows when you’re screwing up and makes it easier to see where you need to focus more of your attention.

Plan your responses ahead for what you’ll do when temptation arises

• Get ready for everyone to (unknowingly) try to knock you off the rails of success. Make sure you know what you’ll say when it comes up. Don’t let something silly make the difference between you and success.

Poll your friends - make them be very honest

• Our friends usually know more about our weaknesses than we do. Most of us go our whole lives without knowing the list of flaws other people keep about us. Get that thing out in the open as soon as possible.

Use visual reminders all over the place

• Sticky notes, dry erase markers on your windows, and note cards taped to the dash board. Everything helps to remind yourself of what you need to maintain focus on.

Practice the art of ‘self deprivation’

• Forego the sugar in the coffee, take a cold shower, do without the AC in the car, or figure out a way to deprive yourself of something, even if it’s small.
• When we do this, it builds the muscle of discipline, and teaches our brain that there’s a new sheriff in town. Over time, it begins to obey more and more.

​Write your goals down. Read them every - single - day

• Not only do you need to read them to remember them, you’re teaching your subconscious what to focus on.
• The subconscious DOES NOT speak English. When you visualize your goals as you read them, it gets the images you’d like to get into your life.

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